Hey Iran, Here Comes Georgie!!

Word has it that the much anticipated Iranian invasion is planned for March 1. That generally means that it will happen a little sooner, but we'll see. The only thing that I see changing this is if Iran caves in to Boosh, but in my view chances of that are slim and it might not matter anyway. We've talked about this potentially happening for some time and there is no need to rehash old material, so this will be short. There are other posts on this topic on this site, so feel free to look through the archives.

The Fiction

As we are all well aware, one of the less talked about reasons for the Iraqi invasion was their threat of selling Iraqi oil using a currency different than the US dollar. Heaven forbid that a sovereign country be allowed to choose what currency they wish to deal in, but we all know that he who carries the biggest stick influences such matters.

In the last day or two, Iran has announced that they will be switching to Euros in handling all transactions within their country. On the surface, it would appear that they are making this choice to once again taunt the US and Boosh in order to further humiliate us, and him. This seems to be a popular sport among certain world leaders these days. But, as usual with this corrupt administration, it is not what it seems.

In what could be described as an end run around the United Nations sanctioning body, Booshco has essentially forced the Iranians hand in this matter. They have done so by quietly threatening negative “consequences” to any country that uses our phony US dollars to purchase Iranian goods, thus in theory cutting Iran off from all US dollars. So, what is Iran to do? Stop selling oil? Agree to be sanctioned at the sole discretion of George W. Boosh? Hardly. They did the only practical thing and decided that if dollars were not going to be coming their way, they must accept something for their goods. Euros just seem to be as good a choice as any.

This is just one more example of total incompetence on the part of this administration. I often think that sooner or later they have to do something right, but they continue to disappoint. You see, Iran would likely have soon made the switch to Euros or some other form of currency in the very near future without our intervention. They would have done so for the very reasons that Boosh would like you to believe that they are doing so now, solely to humiliate and spit in the face of the evil empire and its moronic leader. But, were Boosh to allow that to occur naturally, it would not look like he is the Decider. So, he has chosen this “back door” course. Forgive me; I don’t have my DSM IV handy. (For those unfamiliar with the DSM, it is the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) But, when one forces something to happen that is soon to happen anyway, making said person look foolish in the long run for advancing the pace of an action that is already inevitable, and does it for the sole purpose of proving that one is a powerful person, I’m not exactly sure what the diagnosis is. I do know that it is in the book somewhere, but for now we’ll just use “idiot” as a reference point. So, again using Cyclone plain English, the idiot forced the Iranians to switch to Euros so that he can blame them for doing so even though they soon would have switched on their own anyway. Now that we have that sufficiently covered, we can move on.

The Sales Pitch

When Boosh speaks to the nation after the first of the year, he is going to say that he is sending 10-30,000 additional troops to Iraq, specifically the Baghdad area. Exactly where they will come from is anybody’s guess, but if I were in my late 40’s or early 50’s and in the Military Reserves, I might grab a copy of the DSM IV and start feigning signs of some mental illness found therein. Otherwise, I’m afraid I might find myself in the Iraqi Desert sometime soon. Yes, we are that desperate for troops.

Will the American people stand for sending more troops into Iraq so soon after an election where they stated loudly and clearly that they wanted our boys to come home? Well, sad to say, it doesn’t really matter. Because the new Democratic Saviors are already on record saying that they will support a military buildup in Iraq “as long as it’s very short term, like 90-120 days.” At least that is what Harry Reid and others soon to be in leadership have stated. Hmmmm, lets see, it’s almost Christmas now. Add 90-120 days from now to that and March 1 falls toward the outward edge of that time frame. Making a connection yet?

We’ve talked extensively about the massive naval buildup in the Gulf region, so we won’t go much into that again. Just suffice it to say that they are either there already or soon will be. So, add about 30-60 days to get some new troops into Iraq which happens to be right next door to Iran, (pure coincidence I’m sure) and you have some folks to keep an eye on things. They certainly aren’t really needed in Iraq; the Generals on the ground have already said so. We all, except Boosh and Cheney also realize that Iraq is a lost cause, but that’s a different matter. So, if the Iraqi’s don’t want them, and the American Generals don’t want them, could there possibly be another reason for getting them in the region? Again, Hmmmm.

The Results

We will not invade Iran on the ground, beyond using some special ops that are already in place. Oh, we might run a few more folks in there should things go badly, but otherwise, we don’t have the manpower to do so. For a superpower, we sure seem to have some problems with our military. Not too many years ago, say in the 80’s, the theory was that we had the people, weapons, and money to fight 2 ½ wars at the same time. That was always the benchmark, we felt safe as long as we could handle that. Unfortunately, we have proven that we are unable to handle an insurgency in one country of 25 million people, even with all of our soldiers going in and out like they are circling a drive-thru. We are also penniless, so that benchmark is nowhere near being met these days. And, barring a draft, it won’t ever be met again. So, what do we do?

We are going to bomb Iran to hell and back, or at least we think we are. My guess is that we will break out the new toys we’ve been dying to use, like the deep bunker buster bombs that will be necessary to even sniff the underground nuclear facilities that the Iranian’s have, or we think they have. A whole lot of military experts doubt that we know where the majority of these facilities even are. A lot of those bunker busters contain nuclear warheads. Surely, we wouldn’t do that, would we? I don’t know. We have nuclear submarines in the area, as well as other warships with nuclear capabilities on the scene. Why are they there if not to be used? We also have ships from half the countries in the world amassed in the region. Are they all there just for fun and games? Has Boosh finally amassed a coalition?

I will ask the same questions that I asked several months ago when I first said that we were going to attack Iran. It is becoming more apparent each and every day that we are the most dangerous country in the world, and we are led by the most dangerous pair of miscreants in the history of this country, maybe in the history of the world. Do we think that other countries in the world aren’t aware of this? Do we think that others aren’t aware that we are on our last legs, militarily, financially and morally? Do we not realize that we, because of the actions of our leaders, are the most hated group of people on this planet? Do we not realize that Iran, unlike Iraq, will fight back and fight back hard with weapons we have never faced before? And, most importantly, with who do the loyalties of all these other forces amassed in the Gulf Region really lie? We already know that we CAN’T be trusted; do we know that the others CAN?

Cyclone's Conclusion

Listen to what people have said, look at the timeline, do the math and come to your own conclusions. I have already come to mine, which follows.

George W. Boosh has lost his mind. The Iraq Study Group’s report finally snapped the rubber band that was long ago stretched to the max, the one connecting him to the last tiny speck of reality that existed somewhere deep in the recesses of his head. He is on an island, everybody is against him, Daddy joined with the pervert Clinton and turned on him, Cheney can’t be trusted, Rove is AWOL, all his other close advisors have jumped ship, he’s surrounded by traitorous folks from Daddy’s administration, his right wing religious zealot base has abandoned him, the liberal commies have taken over the entire Congress, “hey, can a guy get a drink around here?” Condi, Laura and the dog Barney are about all that’s left and Barney’s been acting a little strange lately, forget the legacy; let’s go out with a bang, whadda ya say?

God help us all,

Cyclone