The China Trip Fiasco

While many Americans struggle to put gasoline in their automobiles and heat their homes, President Boosh is doing nothing to either conserve energy or earn his paycheck. Here are the results of his trip to China.

Boosh wanted to convince Japan to discontinue it's 2 year old ban on the import of US Beef. The Japanese government politely said "No Thanks." Darn, Loss # 1.

Boosh intended to talk the, (joke) "Coalition Partner" South Koreans, out of withdrawing one third of it's 3200 troops from Iraq. The South Korean response? Sending one-way plane tickets to said troops. Loss # 2.

Boosh handed Hu Jintao, the President of China, a list of people that he thought should be released from jail. Boosh seems to think that these people are being irresponsibly held, most on charges that stem from either religious leanings or political writings. That certainly takes some gall, considering that the request is coming from a man responsible for holding an unknown number of Middle Easterner's without charges. We don't know where they are held, who they are, how long we've held them or what crime they have allegedly committed. We do know that secret prisons have been uncovered, torture has been used, and chemical weapons have been unleashed on the Iraqi people, courtesy of the United States Military. President Jintao told Boosh to take his list and shove it. Loss #3.

Boosh had hoped to convince Jintao that the current trade imbalance is killing the American economy, and that they should try to find some way to advance towards correcting this problem. Jintao declined to talk about this issue with our Commandante. The White House spin machine jumped on this one in a hurry. They said, "This was a tiny part of a large conversation." Loss #4

In another request made to help the American economy, Boosh hoped that China would begin to allow Chinese currency to float, allowing outside factors to determine what it was actually worth. This would aid in keeping the American dollar somewhat more stable. Jintao said no, thinks China would prefer to "stay the course." Loss #5

President Boosh, as he does every time he speaks to whomever the President of China happens to be, brought up the ongoing Chinese Human Rights (or lack thereof) Issue. Jintao essentially told Boosh to mind his own business, that China was a country that would decide how to treat it's own people. Without the help or input of the USA.
Loss # 6

For the first time during a Boosh visit to China, reporters were not allowed to question Boosh or Jintao during the trip. The usual farcial "show of unity" did not occur this time around. Jintao, like many American Republican leaders, simply sees no upside to appearing in public with Boosh. Obviously, he is no longer willing to go through the motions. Loss #7

The only news coverage that was allowed in China for the visit was the photographing of Boosh riding a bicycle with the Chinese Olympic Team and hopefuls. And, the only quote from Boosh that the Chinese media was allowed to use, was far less than earth shattering. Prior to the Bike ride, Boosh was heard saying, "Now, take it easy on me guys." I'll be generous and give Boosh a win on this one. Win #1.

So, that's the tally. One win, seven losses. You see, China has us by the gonads. We owe them more money than we have, and President Jintao knows that he no longer has to play the "Diplomat" game. He can now call the shots, because the World community no longer takes us seriously. That, my friends, is how far we have fallen. This trip amounted to Boosh being "taken behind the woodshed" by President Jintao, and given a spanking. He has turned this nation and her power into the laughingstock of the World. The only positive that the White House can pull out of this is that Jintao has agreed to visit the United States sometime in the future. Had that been the goal, as Booshco seems to indicate, it seems that a lot of time and money could have been saved by making a phone call and inviting him. Right now, though, it seems that Boosh would rather be travelling anywhere than facing the questions he gets here at home. No matter the results of the trip.

We can only hope that President Boosh can wield more influence today when he visits Mongolia. What he hopes to gain from that visit, I don't think even God could know. Maybe he can at least be photographed with the leader of that nation, doing more than what he does best, riding a bike.